Officials are on high alert after a sixth fleece mouse disappeared in a Minnesota household under similar suspicious circumstances. “It is like Pink Mouse and the others vanished into thin air,” said Goomba Gumshoe who was brought in to investigate the case. “The perpetrator left nary a clue for me to pounce on.”
Chibi Meow Meow, whose only previous criminal citations are excessive cuteness and playfulness, was named as a kitty of interest in this case. When asked if she knew the whereabouts of the missing mice, Chibi’s gigantic eyes were filled with gigantic tears. “It must be the aliens,” she sobbed.
“For a second, I thought I was interrogating an anime cat,” Goomba commented. “You can’t fake those anime eyes. My expert opinion is that the young lady is innocent.”
“Typical boy,” Nayru grumped while scratching Xes on the eyes of her photo of Goomba. “A pretty kitty bats her eyes and wiggles her tail and he’s ready to believe in little green men. The truth is that she’s a criminal mastermind.”
While some may write Nayru’s comments off as jealousy of a cuter, younger, smarter female feline, a source close to the investigation confirms that it’s not all spoiled tuna. “Up until about a year ago, when Chibi appeared, the home was apparently a safe haven for fleece mice,” the source commented. “In addition, there are multiple reports of Chibi luring unsuspecting mice into her control with a gentle outstretched paw and meows of kindness.”
The case is ongoing as investigators are following down open leads. “I just hope that Chibi finally gets what’s coming to her,” hissed Nayru. “And that ‘what’s coming to her’ is not another mouse.”
In the meantime, the families of the missing mice are NOT DOING ANYTHING. Come on, we’re just talking about toy mice.